Two weeks after my 18th birthday, my backpack, my Eurail Pass, and I set off on a months-long, solo backpacking trip around Europe. In the months leading up to my trip countless people asked me versions of the same question, "Aren't you scared?" My answer was, "Scared of what?"
We've all done & not done things out of fear.
Maybe you've stayed at a job you don't like because the pay is good. Maybe you've stayed in relationships that aren't working because you're afraid of being alone. Maybe you avoid speaking up in meetings because you're afraid you'll be embarrassed. Maybe you don't try new foods because you're afraid you won't like them. Maybe you've held back from expressing your feelings for someone because you're afraid you'll be rejected.
When I left on that backpacking trip, I considered myself shy, not very good with people and (because I'd been bullied throughout my childhood) I expected people to respond to me with hostility. Meeting new people, interacting with people at all, was kind of a scary thing for me.
As a solo-traveler, however, I soon realized that on those long train rides I could either twiddle my thumbs as I watched the world roll by all by my lonesome or, I could "talk to the person on my left" (...or across from me, on my right, really anyone within a 10 foot radius). So, I turned to the person seated next to me and said, "Hi! I'm Marsya 😊" (Always lead with a smile, when introducing yourself 😉 ) Like magic, the person smiled back at me, and I was no longer alone! The world had suddenly become a friendlier, less scary place, all because I took that leap outside my comfort zone.
(Side note: COMMUNITY - CONNECTION - BELONGING - those are the things that make us the happiest. They are also the things that most people say they would like more of.
That leap outside my comfort zone was also a reach outside my bubble to touch someone else, to make a connection.
Most people are living in their bubbles, trying not to bump into other peoples' bubbles, when what they really long for isn't isolation, it's connection. If you reach out to someone with a smile, a kind word, a compliment, you will be amazed at how willing people are to reach back, and how happy both of you will be that you did.)
We can go through life looking for all the things that can go wrong and protecting ourselves against those foreseeable threats. Despite our best efforts, sometimes we're still going to get a metaphorical "bonk on the head."
We can also go through life blithely expecting that everything is all going to work out for the best. If we do that, sometimes we're still going to get a "bonk on the head."
Either way, we're going to get those metaphorical "bonks on the head," hurt, disappointment, heartbreak...
The difference is, one way you're living in a state of fear that sucks the joy out of your day to day moments, and the other way you spend most of your time feeling pretty good.
So, what path will you choose?
Don't hesitate to reach out with your questions & feedback. We love hearing from you!
Wishing you a day filled with light, laughter & growth!
Marsya~
p.s.
For a humorous, witty, wise, discussion of the sentiment I expressed above, check out the video below by the #wokeAF JP Sears.